Wednesday, September 19, 2012

Fear of beauty

I asked her if she believed in God and she looked at me surprised. I told her:
- If you believe in God, tell him to stop torturing me.
She said: 
- What's going on, I don't understand. 
Then I explained: 
- Why did I have to know you? Was it not enough to believe or imagine that you existed? Now it's too late, my life will be hell, I cannot stop loving you and I am aware that you cannot love me. 
She listened to me but didn't say anything.

That girl in particular was so beautiful, I liked her so much, that after a while I preferred to stay away from her. For some reason she made me think of my young and very beautiful mother. I thought: I could love her so much that she would drive me crazy; or I will discover that she is so different from what I think she is that she may disappoint me. I decided that I didn't want neither of that to happen.

Beauty is intimidating, isn't it?

Yes, beauty is intimidating. Women should be careful, particularly when they are young, because if they look too beautiful and too much in control of everything, men fear them; they will not dare to fall in love with a goddess.

J. E. Soice (in his secret notebook)

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